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Perry’s propaganda is hardly intended to change laws

Mitt Romney

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But.  Decoy issues are smoke-screens for a far more radical agenda to shred federalism, if not the 20th C.  What President Perry would deliver goes well beyond “fixing” a program or two.  The core fringe mania is “taking back the country,” per a Perry-Manifesto conspicuous from rightwing ravings. As a public service, I here collate ten, nearly Biblical commandments for a born-again country.  Were God to move in such mysterious ways, President Perry’s first inauguration speech will teem with excess.  You heard it here first.

The Real Perry Manifesto

Mandate #1 – Let us declare our Founders endorsed only small, minimalist government, limited to taxation, currency, repayment of loans and border defense against enemies (armed invaders, immigrants, revolutionaries, deviants, etc.).  Thus, every welfare or social notion since the New Deal is unconstitutional and un-American, namely: Medicare, Social Security, Dept. of Education, EPA, all civil rights laws, funding for science, pandemic diseases, global warming, evolution, PBS, NPR, etc.

Mandate #2 – Because God destined this a Christian nation (with evangelical rule), we should rededicate a true America to be a Dominionist stronghold answerable to a literalist reading of the Holy Bible, as interpreted by born-again preachers and heads of believers’ colleges.  Elections are fine when the elect govern.

Mandate #3 – Abortion shall not only be banned but advocates imprisoned for committing “sins against God’s law.”  Abortion doctors should be indicted for murder, liable to capital punishment.  Women committing abortion shall be fined heavily; or, if poor, be open to impregnation by approved Christians to offset the killing of the unborn.

Mandate #4 – Sexuality outside of marriage will be punished by jail or, if teens and gays, humiliation in public stocks.  Pregnancy outside of marriage shall be illegal, but no child will be aborted, without exception.  Since “gay rights” is an oxymoron, no one can be gay and have any rights.  Just like old times, homosexuality will be sinful, illegal and a mental condition.

Mandate #5 – The Pentagon will be granted direct taxing ability, plus the right to draft heterosexual males, whenever and wherever.  For warrior males over 50, crippled or beyond military service, Pentagon-run camps will establish gung ho patriotism weekends.

Mandate #6  – Gun ownership will be universal for men, optional for women.  No school or location limitations, though counties may restrict minority access.  Any white male over 18 not carrying a gun can’t vote, drink, own property or carouse in public.

Mandate #7  – The old-time religion will become the cultural norm, excepting racial slavery.  Adult males will head households, women will take orders, and children only speak when spoken to.  County government will track Sunday school, tithing, and church services, henceforth signs of the patriotic elect known as “true Americans.”

Mandate #8  – By majority rule, states may nullify any federal stature, especially regarding civil rights, invasions of privacy, or restrictions on alcohol or drug consumption or cultivation.  States by two-thirds majority vote may secede or rejoin the union at will, thus providing a healthy dynamism that checks federal over-reach.

Mandate #9  – Since labor or workers’ union are not mentioned in the Constitution, all unions will be banned and dismantled, not just in the public sector.

Mandate #10 – Federal taxes shall not be raised without a two-thirds vote of Congress; however, taxes shall be lowered by a simple majority of House members.   Every candidate for president, vice-president or senator must provide a long-form American birth certificate, plus evidence of never having been Muslim, socialist, or alien from outer space.

 

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